WORDS ARE MEANINGLESS

in this universe where we are now,
U said the road's too hard for us to take
so I wonder if somehow
I can be somewhere else when im awake

in the second universe, the sky is red
I live in a castle and the view is pretty
but I dont want this. its so sad
cos' they say U live in a different city

in the third universe, where horse can fly
we were married for two years
but this is bad, I made U cry
I have an affair with britney spears

in the fourth one, flowers everywhere
I live in a small town, a regular man
but I like what I see, please take me there
cos' U are beside me, holding my hand

[MM'04]

when I'm down and out, a friend from across the sea came and share some thoughts with me,
and blessed her, i felt a little better :)

she told me that it's normal to lose control in your feelings,
she agreed with me that you cannot measure kindness when it is honest. every single thing we do for our love ones comes from the heart and it sucks when people thing we want something in return, unconditional love does exist!
we hate it when people said you're 'too nice'... we're not even trying to be nice, we just do what our heart thinks is the right thing to do. (besides, apa gunanya melakukan sesuatu setengah hati?)
everything we do is our way to share our love and you don't have to worry for love shortage, cause giving and sharing make love grows.

she also told me that it is normal to lose your logic, because there is no logical definition for love anyway (pheeew, at least i know someone dont think i'm stupid)

we talked about other things; insecurity, safety in relationship, etc.
but sadly i have to admit, there is no theory that is 100% true in love, you just have to take a chance.
who knows, you might find the love of your life (sigh) or you might break your heart badly(double sigh).
Just give the best for someone you love ( I bet she also agree with me on this). True love can move a mountain (self motivating again :p)

thank you al! for listening and sharing hehehe take care!

(mm'04)

for once...i dont want to let go
i know that's what love is all about...so they say
but for once...i want a different end for this story
I dont think i ask too much,
am I?
so God if I may...
please allow me for once,
not to let go of this dream...
I maybe too far from you to ask for anything.
but if I may, please let this be.
I know you makes everything right in their own time,
but Im prayin for this one, with all my heart,

...maka kehendakMu jadilah. Amin

when facts and answers bring sadness and more questions, is it better to know nothing? hmmm...

don't you wish you were young again my friend? when questions or problems wont last more than a day in your head,
when you don't care wether people gave you the right answer or not,
and you don't care which part you take as long as you're in the game.

"where does the rain comes from sir?"

"the rain falls when your heart is sad kid, that's why you have to wear a smile all the time so that the sun will always shine for you"
......................................

"let's play 'family'!"

"ok, can i be the dad?"

"no, you can't, you'll be the uncle"

"oh ok, i'm the uncle then!"

thou shalt not fear.....
thou shalt not fear.....
thou shalt not fear.....
thou shalt not fear.....
thou shalt not fear.....
thou shalt not fear.....
thou shalt not fear.....
thou shalt not fear.....
thou shalt not fear.....
thou shalt not fear.....

I can't help it...I'm scared :(

From: Mr Weak
To: Queen

Dear Queen,
Hello there, how are you? I hope you're doing fine.
Here I am queen, still trying to understand what happened and why it happened.
Forgive me for annoying you with my persistency.
But I guess I am not used to this.
But then again, who will ever get used to losing one of the most important thing in their life?
But for you my queen, I will try to be strong the way you want me too. I will try to be the man you want me to be.
I know soon you will fine someone, and soon you will have another world to burn and forget mine, I know there are some guys out there waiting more than happy for you to burn their world.
I am scared every single second thinking about this, but your happiness should comes first.

I will pray for you everyday, but forgive me if I will still ask God to unite us again and forever. This is all I can do to keep my dream alive, so please understand.
You must think I am being weak and stubborn, but If you ever feel the way i feel right now, I think you will understand.
Dear queen, I know you care about me, and that means the world to me! Its one of the thing that help me face each day of my life. I wanna thank you for that.

I still hope that God will show us a way to be together, if not in this life, maybe in the next.
and if we are not meant to be, I know it is because there is someone better for you in His plan.
You deserve the best my queen, and deep in my heart I always wish I may deserve you. I cant help thinking I might have done something really bad in the past for losing you.

This is a lousy letter, messy, lame and cheesy. But I meant each words i said.

There are many many things I wanna say and do, but I will try not to ask more of your time.

Take care queen, I hope you will understand if I cant keep my finger from typing those sms or dialling your number sometimes, But missing someone is something you just cant control

All the best for you my queen,
people say that you shouldnt say 'I love you' too much cos it will lose its meaning...
but I know I can say it a thousand times to you and meant each single one of them
so here it is...to end my letter
I love you
...a thousand times.

Yours truly

-me-

P.S: i miss those huggies :) like the desert miss the rain

Life is funny…
Since youre small they tought you to love everyone equally cos everyone’s the same in God’s eyes...
Then when you grew up suddenly they say you cannot love someone because they’re ‘different’
Since youre small they tought you that there is only one God to whom we shall serve...
Then they tell you that you shouldn’t love someone because his/her God is ‘different’…
GIVE ME A BREAK!!!….

Since you’re small they tought you to love everyone the way you love yourself...
Then suddenly they want you to hide your love away because your love is ‘wrong'
Damn, Are we ruled by our own inconsistency?
Are we so afraid of differences that we tend to ignore the basic things: To love God the Almighty, the creator of the whole universe, and to love His creation the way He loves us?
Is it so important to keep these differences, so that everyone remain in their own ‘right’ place in their own ‘community’? and why? So that they wont lose their HATE towards other people with different beliefs, culture or religion? So that there will always be a reason for war?, for conflict? For Confusion?
OH COME ON!!!

Sometimes I feel we’re living under the rules made by people who care about nothing but their own fear of differences.
I hope I’m wrong, theres gotta be more sensible reason for all this.
Prejudice, stereotyping, etc are so yesterday…

They say that we're all social creatures, that's why we have to do things that are 'socially acceptable' and that includes who you should and shouldn't love...

I just think it’s stupid sometimes…but hey, what do I know.

[MM'04]

*sigh*
i have to stop....
asking those questions
doing those things
thinking those thoughts
trying to guess what's on her mind
instead...
i should tell her things she'd rather hear
doing things that will make her happy
wear a smile for her so that i can get her smile in return...
the smile that burns my world

[MM'04]

where will this journey take me?
my heart is my guide and I let him lead
hold my hand so I can assure you
for no words I know, can do

Nothing is certain and everything will pass
so let me hold you like everyday is the last
say your prayers and praise the Almighty
for love, like life....is free

[MM'04]

do you believe in signs?? hehehee

1st sign: starbucks
before working at Standard Chartered bank, my sisters husband' worked at Citibank, the morning before meeting the guy from StandChart to talk about his move, he is still in doubt.
So he arrived at the office, turned on the computer, and the computer asked him to change his password because the current one will expire soon. So he look around for an idea, and saw a cup of Starbucks coffee. and so he entered "Starbucks" as his new password.
And later that afternoon the guy from StandChart called and said: "Can we meet today?, and so my sisters husband said: "Ok, you pick the place" and the guy replied: " why dont we meet at Starbucks".....and in that meeting my sisters' husband made an agreement to move to standchart, and one thing that helped him made his decision is: "the Starbucks sign"

2nd sign: Universe
after months of looking for new name for my new band, suddenly we have to make our decision immediately. We're suppose to submit the name to Mtv on sky for event promotion. and so we decided to choose UNIVERSE, the name i suggested few night before. And so that is the name we use for our first performance......About a month after the show, i was experiencing office boredom. Every job i had to do is so boring. And so i browse the internet to look for any job openings. And then i saw that UNIVERSAL MUSIC INDONESIA is looking for a Graphic Designer....and just yesterday, they call me to say i got the job :)....i know its not a big deal or anything, but i think its funny being in a band called UNIVERSE while working in UNIVERSAL :)

[MM'04]